Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Depressive Episode Coping Box

    I got the idea of a "Depressive Episode Coping Box" from a user on Reddit. It's a box filled with specific items to get you through a depressive episode. The user was asking for kind thoughts from fellow redditors so that she can put in her box. She also listed some of the things she put in her box. Well I decided to come up with a few things to put in my own box. You can make your own box too. And if you don't have bipolar disorder you can just call your box a "happy box".

1. A kind letter from self-
     Write yourself a nice letter. Say things to yourself that you would say to a friend who was in pain. Treat yourself with the same compassion you would show others. Here is a good website on self- compassion.

2. Letters from loved ones-
     This might take a little courage but asked loved ones to write you a letter. This can be a friend, a parent, a sibling, or anyone who would have some lovely words for or about you. I like to gather a few from several people. Keep these in your box so that you can reread them.

3. Feel Good movies-
     Best Buy and Walmart have some $5 bins with movies in them. Dig through them and find some feel- good movies that you can keep in your box. I might write a post on a list of Feel Good movies!

4. Silly Pictures-
     Snapchat has some great features that alter your face. I love to make silly faces a print the pictures for my box. I take pictures of my friends and the always put a smile on my face.

5. Non-caffeinated tea bags and favorite mug-
     Some suggestions for this are Yogi St Johns Blues Away Tea and Yogi Relaxed Mind. Or a simple chamomile tea.

6. Coloring book and crayons-
     Lately adult coloring books have been getting plenty of attention for the positive affect they have on stress and depression. They can be found at Barnes and Noble or even the book sections at Target.

7. Index card with favorite quotes-
     You can put any kind of quotes but my favorite are quotes from children's books.

8. Bath bombs-
     Who doesn't love a good, nice, warm bath? Well I like to add bath bombs to my bath because the smell can be soothing and it looks cute! If you're not a fan of Lush then you can try a normal bubble bath.

9. Music playlist-
     A list of songs that make you want to get up and dance by yourself in your room. Or simple songs that make you happy.

10. Phone list-
A list of phone numbers of the top three people in your support system. I would also add the National crisis hotline 1-800-273-TALK.

Sunday, June 5, 2016

Twenty Facts About Me

1. I'm 24 years old.

2. I work for Urban Outfitters and I love every minute of my job.

3. I am a student studying Fashion Merchandising and I hope to be a Visual Merchandiser someday.

4. I love love love to drink coffee! Day or night this is my go to drink. However, I've been cutting back on drinking so much.

5. I have a 4 year old daughter name Harley Quinn.

6. I play the ukulele, piano, and a little bit guitar. Ukulele is my favorite of the three instruments.

7. My favorite colors are white and purple.

8. I'm 5 '1 and I feel very short considering the height requirement to sit without a carseat is 4 '7.

9.I love wearing black clothing! Especially dresses.

10. My favorite t.v. show is Gilmore Girls. Seriously the best show ever and I cannot wait for the movies that are coming to Netflix soon.

11. My favorite movie is Moonrise Kingdom. I also love anything by Wes Anderson.

12. I am a Capricorn which mean I am a hard worker!

13. Audrey Hepburn is not only my favorite actress but someone I find very inspiring because she gave so much to the world during her lifetime.

14. I have ran four L.A. MARATHONS. 26.2!

15. I love living in California because it's one of the best places ever! You can visit a mountain, desert, beach, city life, or forest all in one day.

16. Karen O is one of my favorite singers right now. Crush Songs has been the soundtrack of my life since 2014.

17. Sarah Burton, the creative director for Alexander McQueen is my favorite designer.

18. October is my favorite month because I love Halloween and everything just feels more magical during Autumn.

19. I sometimes play video games. The last game I was obsessed with was Destiny. I still play it from time to time. My console is a PS4 and my PSN is L1TTLEM1SSV1XEN.

20. I have Bipolar Disorder and PTSD and I address this to fight the stigma that there is on mental health issues.

Friday, June 3, 2016

Why I Am Proud Today

    I sat on my couch shaking. All I could think about was the different ways I can die today. Someone could walk in the door and kill me, an earthquake can tear apart my apartment, or some sort of electrical freak accident would burst everything to flames. My thoughts were racing. I could not focus on the television for the life of me.
     Are these thoughts that everyone have everyday? Or were these all symptoms of a manic episode? I don't know much about bipolar disorder. Other than I have it. At this moment though it feels like it has me.
     I didn't know if I should call my doctor. I had just been seen by a doctor a few days ago and she decided to start me on a new medication. But then I began to fear my own medication and it's side effects. I wanted to flush them down the toilet. Instead I decided to call my closest friends to distract myself.
     When none of them answered I finally decided to call my dad and ask him for help. So I packed my bags and decided to spend the rest of the week with him. This was the hardest thing for me to do. I don't like to ask my parents for help unless I really need it. My dad didn't think there was anything wrong with me. He was used to seeing his daughter strong. But when he saw me crying and shaking with fear I think it finally hit him.
     I still believe that I am that strong girl he raised. Because it took everything inside of me to reach out for help. Even though my first attempt was a little bit of a disappointment I was able to try again.
    I don't feel as scared anymore. Just a little wired. But it feels great to be with family and out of that place of loneliness in my apartment.